First+Period-+Question+4

Group Members: Kendyl Cole, Joyce Mason Carter, Caityln Threadgill, Ann Marie Stewart =**Question #4**=

**Do adults understand teenagers? Explain.**
Patrick responding as Holden- There ain't no goddamn way adults can understand teenagers. Simply put, they haven't lived as adolescents in this era, times are different. They try to push their ideas to keep times the same, but that's just goddamn impossible. Mr. Spencer tells me life is a game, I believe that, but I think it's always changin'. I want to help take care of youths and not let them get into trouble with conformity. Teenagers can deal with their own issue how they see fit. No adults need to get in the way. This game of life is better understood by teenagers because they are living with a better perspective than those goddamn adults. Adults can live their own lives, I'll be perfectly content with mine. Just leave me be, I'll live.

Kendyl Cole responding as Holden Caulfied: Adults don't know a goddamn thing about teenagers, but they're always acting like they do. You know they're just acting all 'parental' cause that's what they're supposed to do. People are always acting like they're supposed to, ya know? Adults are all just phonies who stride through life acting like someone they're not. My parents sure as hell don't understand me. No one understands me except Phoebe and Allie. I think Sally may too..she sure is swell. My mom cares in all, she really does, she tried to get me the right skates that one time. My louse of a father doesn't understand me, all he understands is lawyer talk and fancy parties. Mr. Spencer always thought I had potential or some bull like that. He thinks preachin' to me is gonna make me do well in school, well that's sure some bull if I ever heard it! I use to think Mr.Antinolli understood me, and look where that got me? That goddamn perv touchin' my head in all, gave me the creeps. If that intellectual bastard Old Luce was here, I'm sure he would've spotted that flit in a damn near second. No one in my god forsaken life cares enough to understand me, especially adults. I don't need them phonies anyway! As long as I got old Phoeb's and maybe Sally, I'll be fine. Don't goddamn worry about me.

Lisa J. commenting on Kendyl Cole I like you´re response as Holden and I think it sounds like him. He would definitely say that adults don´t understand teenagers, but Phoebe and Allie understand him. I like that you used so much examples from the text and I like the words because Holden would use those words. The only thing I´m not sure about is if he would say Sally understands him. Isn´t he closer to Jane and likes her more? I think Holden would say Jane, Allie and Phoebe understand him but all the adults don´t.

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Caitlyn Threadgill responding as Holden Caulfield: There is no goddam way my parents understand me. I'm not the same kid I used to be before Allie died. I've grown up from boarding school to boarding school and my parents can't even simply tell that I'm unhappy. My mother is a nervous wreck and constantly thinks I'm going nowhere in life. And my father, well he's hardly ever around, always busy with his goddam lawyer work; what great parental support I have. All father does is 'potentially' save people's lives, "and drink Martinis and look like a hot-shot." My younger sister understands me more than my parents do, and I can always talk to her. Now being kicked out of Pencey I don't even want to know how angry my parents will be when they find out, and as my sister puts it, "Daddy's going to kill you." I figure out something to do though, I always do. I mean my parents already think I'm a failure and all I really want to do is runaway from this goddam place. My parents don't understand anything about me and never seem to have time to talk, leaving me on my own goddam self in this world full of "hot-shots" and phonies.======

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Caitlyn Threadgill: Although adults have been teenagers some point in there life, times have changed and so have the experiences of being a teenager. The generation teens live in now is much different than their parents and grandparents, etc. There is more technology available to complete school assignments and morals have become quite loose. There is also more pressure on modern adolescents to get into a good college, play lots of sports, drink, smoke, etc. Parents did have these pressures too but due to new technology pressure has become that much stronger. Even though life is different than when our parents were teenagers does not mean they don't know what's best for us. They have been there done that and know how to help guide you to become successful. Teenagers should listen to their parents advice as well as making responsible decisions for them self. Sometimes we may not think parents understand us but in the end they know more about life and the harsh reality with making bad choices than we do. The main reason parents constantly nag us about getting homework done and making responsible choices in life is because they know we will be better off later in life. Parents want their teenagers to grow up and become well-respected and intelligent adults, so we will have a happy and successful life.======

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Emmie Doherty responding to Caitlyn Threadgill- Like you said, times have changed since our parents were teenagers; it is a whole new world out there filled with new technology and morals. It can be hard at times for parents to understand where a teenager is coming from or even what they are talking about. Getting into college is also getting harder, putting even more pressure on teenagers, as you said. This pressure parents may not have felt, leading to a gap in their understanding of their teenagers’ world. I also agree with your statements that in the end parents know what’s best for teenagers. Parents may not understand every little aspect of a teenager’s life, but they do know what’s good for their teen. As you said, parents have been there and done that; they have been through life and may give some helpful advice. Parents may annoy their teens at times but they know what’s going to be best for them now and later in life. ====== Emma O'Halloran (responding to Caitlyn)- I totally agree with what you have said. Parents did go through adolescence, but it a different time. Their experiences were quite different that what teenagers are experiencing now. Adults may understand the over all problem teenagers are going through, but that doesn't mean they necessarily know how to go about fixing it. I like how you used technology to explain the difference in understanding. It does play a huge role in teenagers lives and I hadn't really ever thought of it as a pressure for teenagers. Adults now never experienced the technology we have today so they don't understand pressures that come with it. Adults will never fully understand what teenagers are going through, but it's true that they just want you to live "a happy and successful life." Gordon Morris responding to all 3- So yeah basically what everyone has already said. They don't really understand us as teenagers in this day and age. Technology has changed not that that has much to say about why they don't understand us, teenagers today have the luxury of technology whenever we want it basically. When our parents were growing up there was not as much stress involved in school and the work that came with it, but today we get so much stress put on our plates that they cannot even begin to comprehend.

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Kendyl Cole: Despite what some teens think, adults are just grown up teenagers who've endured similar problems to the ones we do today. The life of a teenager often revolves around friends, college, fun, and pressure. Adults went through the same situations when they were teenagers, just in a different time and with different circumstances. When an adult tells a teenager, " I know what you're going through" or "I was a teenager once", most kids will respond with a slight tone of angst, "It's different now". Why do teenagers have this idea that even though adults were teenagers at some point, they won't understand what it's like to be a teen today? I spend the majority of my time working hard to get into college, relaxing with friends, and trying to not succumb to the pressure from people around me. Ask any adult, and I'm sure they can tell you that they went through the exact same thing. Our generation is one of technological advances, media domination, lowered morals, and competition. The school curriculum is harder than it was 50 years ago, any adult will tell you that, but we also have the technology that makes it all easier. Teenagers are constantly pressured to meet the standards that our society and media have set. Adults had to deal with this pressure too, from their parents and from the unspoken expectations of society at that time. Today, sex and drugs are inescapable factors of teen life that are often argued over between adults and teens. Sex and drugs are highly publicized in today’s society, making them seem like a very new and modern obsession. Adults dealt with these problems as well, but since they were not spoken about, they didn’t seem as much of an issue. Teenagers these days are having more sex and doing more drugs, but that doesn’t mean that adults never dealt with the same problems. Teenagers, from generations before and after ours, will always believe that adults don’t understand what they’re going through. Adults, from generations before and after ours, will always understand just enough.======

Whitney Sharp (commenting on Kendyl): When I first read this question I thought, no way do adults understand teenagers! We have it so different today than they did 30, 40 years ago, how could parents //possibly// be able to relate to what we have to deal with these days. Back then there wasn't as much pressure to do well in school so you can get accepted into a prestigious university and go on to get a well-paying job and make something out of yourself! Oh wait... Well back then they //definitely// didn't have to deal with peer pressure to drink and smoke and be sexually active! Oh wait... After reading Kendyl's post I would have to agree that adults do probably understand teenagers a little better than we might like to admit. When they say they've been there before, they really have.Teenagers and adults have never seen eye to eye on issues ever since the cavemen, and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon. It's in our DNA to disregard older generations but maybe we need to stop being so hard-headed. And next time our parent says "I know how you feel", instead of just blowing them off and slamming the door shut, we should listen to what they have to say, because they might have some valuable advice to offer based on a similar, personal experience.

Emily Ashley (responding to Kendyl): I do agree with Kendyl, but also have other views on this question. As to how I agree, I think she is right when she says that adults did go through being a teenager once, and they also had tempations of drugs, and sex, just like teen do today. Adults also had to go through the period of finding out who they are and going through the social hell that high school can be. Many teenagers resent their parent, saying that they have no idea what they're goign through at this time in their life. But honestly, your parents went through high school too. They had emotional problems just like you do, and also probably had to deal with their own parents "not understanding them". But the thign I differ on, is that times really have changed and society is different. Now-a-days, kids are experiencing sex and drugs and other mature things younger and younger. Kids in elementary school are doing what our parents would say is completely unaccptable and would never have thought that would happen, because it didn't when they were that age. Sex and virginity was taken much more seriously when our parents were younger, and I believe that they are constantly surprised by the lack of seriousness that kids and teenagers take it with. I don't think it's that adults don't understand teenagers, because they have been th rough the etenage years. But adults have been through a slightly different time, and are just getting used to how things are now.

Darien Lombardi (in Response to Sarah Hoffman) - I agree with what your saying about how adults have had to cope with similar societal pressures in their day as well. Im sure in their generation what they faced in terms of sex, drugs, and academics seemed overwhelming and unfair as well when they looked upon how easy their parents had it with education and adolescence. Adults have been through their teenage years and know exactly what teenagers fundamentally face in terms of social and academic pressures. The truth is that teenagers are supposed to feel like no-one in the adult world understands them. Believing that you are alone is just a process of forming ones identity because it allows for a path of self discovery that isn't influenced by any adult or authority figure telling you what you should be. So, in essence, no adult does understand you because you have yet to understand yourself and who you are. It's impossible for an adult to exactly experience what you have or know all the pressures you face because, not to be cheesy, we are all unique snowflakes

Jessica Malette (response to Kendyl)- I agree with many of the things that Kendyl stated especially the fact that most adults went through some of the same problems we go through today although things are different. When many of us talk about how it is different now then it was back then I agree and disagree all at the same time. Yes, there were things that were different, and no, there were things that are almost exactly the same. For one thing that Kendyl mentioned, the school curriculum is 1000 times different then it was 35 years ago. It has become much more challenging and rigorous than before (especially if one lives in Chapel Hill- Carrboro City Schools) I know that both my parents are completely in shock at my homework load and my lack of free time. For example, my dad tells me all the time how when he was in high school he barely had any homework and he had much free time which he filled up with things like sports and a job. Now, playing sport in high school is almost like a death wish because the short time you had before to do your work is now taken by sports. Also another thing that is has changed is that when many of our parents were in high school the drinking age was only 18 instead of 21. This is always my moms excuse when she compares drinking in high school now to when she was in high school. Basically that it "wasn't as bad" as it is now. Though things are different now, I believe it really all depends on the person you use to be as a teen or the person you have become now on whether or not adults understand teenagers.

Joyce Carter - My first thoughts when reading the question were, of course not! How could they, they don't have to put up with the pressure we teens go through today. And even the phrase, things have changed and people are so different now-a-days. In reality our parents are just the adult version of ourselves. The main difference a parent and their teenager is that parents have lived long enough to experience the ways of life at multiple stages of a lifetime. Since we are still just teenagers, we have not had such experiences yet, choosing the right friends,or waiting until marriage to have sex. As teens we often hang-out around the people who we share the most common intrests with, and those who make us laugh. These is good in all friendships, but sometimes we fail to realize the bad sides of friendships; parents help us to see them. Because our parents don't have the connection to many of our friends, as we do, they can see what we don't. They can see when their child is being used, and when their child's friends are bad influences. When parents comfront their child about these types of issues, the child tends to deny the accusations and become defensive and sometimes rebelious just for the heck of it. The truth is, parents are usually right when it comes to surrounding your self with the right friends; most teens know that, but still ignore parents. Teenagers also tend to think that their parents don't know anything about how life as a teenager is now and how much pressure they have in and out of school, unfortunately they do because they have gone through a majority of the same situations as their teens. For example, my mom always says to me, "You shouldn't be so gullable to what these little boys say to you. You need to know that all they really want is to get in your pants!" My mom says this exact line everytime the sex subject comes-up between us, which makes me think it was a phrase that was planted in her head when she was a teenager; by her mom. Parents are indirectly taught by their parents, how to raise their children, and they are prepared for the rocky teenage stage that we all go through in life. .