First+Period-+Question+1

=** Group Members: Emily Honey, Emmie Doherty, Emily Ashley, Rachel Wilson **= =QUESTION #1= **To what extent does the average adolescent reveal his or her true emotions and thoughts to the people around him or her?** Rachel W as Holden: I dont think people talk about how they feel to anyone. Everyone is a phony! I share my emotions with people i care about, like Phoebe and Allie, but i mostly just keep my thoughts to myself. It is hard for people to share how they feel though if they dont have someone to share with. Im glad i can be there for Phoebe. Mom is just to upset about Allie's death to be there and suport her. I dont think kids share with their parents. They share with their teachers, like i did with Mr. Antolini and Mr. Spencer. Mr. Spencer even asked me, "How do you //feel// about all this boy? Im very interested to know. Very interested." (pg13) Mr. Spencer was interested in helping me and trying to see what i wanted out of life. I never really liked sharing information about my life. I dont like to talk about how i feel and what i want to do and when i do talk about the situation im in, it just gets me so goddam depressed that i dont want to talk to anyone about it. I think people have different ways of telling people what is going on in their lives and mine is just not to. Emmie Doherty Wiki #5- After reading the novel my opinion on this question has changed a little. I still believe that teenagers tend to share with their friends and peers rather than adults. However, I now am aware that there are teenagers out there who don’t really share any of their emotions or thoughts. When I first answered this question, I thought everyone at least had one friend they could tell everything to. But now I realize there are people out there, like Holden, who don’t have a best friend and who don’t really share any of their emotions. Besides that change, I feel as though the novel helped support my beliefs even more. There are boys in the book who are always confiding in Holden their thoughts or emotions, even though Holden finds this annoying. Also, the novel shows how the boys in the book don’t confide in their parents. This is shown when Holden puts off telling his parents what happened at school. It is also shown when Ernest Morrows mom has no idea what her son does at school or how he acts. So I standby by my earlier statement that teens rarely share with their parents, but I would now say that not everyone has a best friend they tell everything to.

Emmie Doherty as Holden - The average teen doesn’t share any of their emotions or thoughts with anyone. Teens keep to themselves for good reasons, why would you want a bunch of phonies knowing how you feel and what you’re thinking. Take me for example. I once said “... and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I dint feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth.”(pg1). What I’m trying to say here is that I don’t like sharing all the personal information about my life, thoughts, and emotions, and I believe all teens feel the same way I do. I have never had a teen confess all their thoughts and emotions to me or any other guy at those lousy prep schools for that matter. And since we’re stuck at those phony schools, I know other teens don’t confess their thoughts and emotions to their parents. This is just all the more proof that teens confess their true thoughts and emotions to no one. Also, why should we share our thoughts and emotions when we don’t understand half the things we feel. For example, when my brother Allie died, I punched out all the windows in our family car. I still don’t understand what I was feeling to make me do that, and if I don’t understand, why would I even try and convey what I was feeling to some phony? Teens have some crazy emotions and thoughts that even they can’t comprehend, and if you don’t understand yourself, you can’t share those thoughts and emotions with others. Teens keep to themselves and don’t share their emotions and I am proof of this.

John Benton commenting on Emmie Doherty I think that this is a pretty good representation of Holden, and wasn't as annoying as some other posts have been. It was nice that you only put "phonies" once, unlike some other people that feel the need to say it in every sentence. I also liked how you used examples from the text to support your arguments. While Holden might not have said "I once said," it is still a good way of proving a point. You provided two noticeable examples from the book, and this really helped in terms of showing your side of the story. I also liked how the text was clear and easy to read. While this may seem like a necessary thing, people often make confusing sentences when they are trying to talk in a certain vernacular. Unlike most comments (as Holden, that is) your response was fairly clear of this.

Lisa J. commenting on Emmie Doherty I think that is pretty much how Holden would answer that question. I agree that he would say teens don´t share their emotions with anyone. l like that you say that kids don´t understand their feelings and that´s why they don´t share it with others. Holden often says that he feels like doing something but doesn´t know why. You repeated yourself like Holden does it all the time and you used words he would use. Holden would also use himself as an example and I like that you did that, too. All in all, I think it sounds like Holden.

Emmie Doherty- I believe adolescents actually reveal a lot of their emotions and thought to some people around them. Usually when an adolescent reveals his emotions and thoughts it is to a friend who they care about and trust. We all have that best friend who we tell everything to and whom we sometimes even talk to just to share our thoughts and emotions. When you have had a bad day and you just need to talk, your best friend is there to listen to you express your thoughts and emotions. Adolescents will also share their thoughts and emotions with their peers, not just best friends. Peers may be having the same thoughts or emotions and are there to give advice and listen. Although adolescents may share their thoughts and emotions with their peers and friends frequently, they don’t typically share them with adults or parents. Many parents have no idea how their child is feeling or what they are thinking. This is because adolescents don’t typically feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and emotions with their parents or any adult for that matter. Adolescents will rarely confide in anyone outside their age group. I’m not sure if it’s the age difference that creates this barrier between teens and adults or the adolescents feeling as though their parents can’t understand them. Either way, adolescents typically only share their emotions and thoughts with their friends and peers.

Caitlyn Threadgill responding to Emmie Doherty: I agree with the fact that adolescents typically share their feelings and thoughts to best friends and even sometimes aquaintances. Many adolescents are able to relate and understand the emotions of other people their age because they tend to go through the same experiences. Since we are all from the same generation we tend to have the same thoughts and emotions about stress, pressure, relationships, etc. making it easier for us to communicate and relieve ourselves by having the chance to discuss what's on our mind. I agree with you, Emmie, when you say adolescents do not typically share the way they feel with their parents because we are all going through a tough time with growing up and becoming independent individuals and we tend to think our parents will not understand the way we feel. But i do not think that's the case for everyone, some people are very close to their parents and are able to share anything and everything with them. Many adolescents will go to their parents when they need advice about school, enemies, and possibly relationships. It all comes down to how often you share your emotions and thoughts and how close you are to your parents. But in the end, adolescents tend to think they do not need help from their parents and that they know always what to do when in a conflict or stressed. Adolescents want to be independent and if they do want advice, first choice is usually friends.

Emily Ashley-I think that the extent of how much an adolescent reveals his or her emotions really depends on who the adolescent is. All teenagers are different, and I don't think that you can really say that there is an "average" adolescent in this situation. Some adolescents are much more emotional, and typically wear their emotions on the outside where others can read them easily, and don't mind talking about what may be bothering them. Others are more inner and personal, and tend to hide their emotions and only share with people very close to them. When it comes to a teen revealing their feelings to the people around them, I believe it mostly depends on the trust they have with those people. The closer you are to the people around you, the more you will share to them. Being insecure is very common among adolescents, and so finding people who they can talk to and be emotional around is something they really hold onto and will really cherish. Friends are sometimes the most important thing in a teenagers life, and I feel that they reveal their emotions most to their friends. Yes, they can have other acquaintances around them, and family too, but they have built up such a big trust with their good friends and that's who they feel the most comfortable around.

Whitney Sharp (commenting on Emily Ashley): I agree with Emily that it totally depends on the adolescent. I don't think that in this day and age there is necessarily a "typical" teenager. Some are definitely more extroverted than others (myself included) but there are introverts that prefer to keep others at a distance. I have learned, from personal experience, that I wear my emotions on my sleeve. Even if I don't necessarily want the world to know how I'm feeling at that particular time, apparently my face gives me away every time, especially if I'm upset about something. I would say that I am an extremely open person, and sometimes thats not always such a good thing. I agree that people are more open with people that they are close to and trust, but sometimes its beneficial to share thoughts and feelings with someone who doesn't know you as well because they might be able to offer a fresh perspective on an issue. Friendship is definitely one of the most important things in our lives right now as teens so when we find those few, special people we really have a connection with we cherish it.

Reade Paterno (Commenting on Emily Ashley): I agree with Emily in that I think it depends on who the adolescent is in terms of whether or not they share things. Some teenagers are completely fine with showing their emotions, and allow everyone to get close. They are really outgoing and can tell almost anyone anything. However, even though there are some teenagers like that, I think that the majority are more reserved. Most teenagers don't really like sharing things with others, and it takes a close friend to get them to do that, as Emily said. Usually, there are going to be around three or four friends that the teenager will share his deeper feelings with, but other than that, I think the average teenager keeps to himself. One thing that Emily didn't mention though, is that the type of friends are also really important. Along with whether or not the teenager is reserved, the people around him have to be great friends to get him or her to open up. I disagree with Emily in that teenagers are the most comfortable around their friends. Although friends are incredibly important and often very important to teenagers, I feel like the family always comes first. Your family is who you go to when things go wrong, and they're always going to be there for you.

Rachel Wilson-I think that adolescents share what they really feel and believe to certain extents with different people. Some people are raised to share their feelings and express how they really feel, but there are some people who are trying to fit in. They say what they think their friends want to hear. The scary thing about that is, that these people who arent true to themselves, grow up living this "lie" to themselves and they act like that as an adult. Adults arent intentionally out their trying to get peoples approval, like teens in highschool, but they arent really seeing who THEY are. There are some adolescents who share almost EVERYTHING they feel. They wear all of their emotions on their sleeves. This is another way for them to get approval or attention. Being truthful would be a person who speaks the truth about themself, but that is rare in a teen struggling to fit in to society and their peers. This is a fork in the road of our lives. We either get past the peer pressure and trying to be cool and reach for the answer to who we really are and who we are trying to be in the world, or we follow the "norm." I think that depending on how comfortable you feel with a person is how much you share with them. Make sure you dont tell a lie to them about how you feel though, becuase then you would be lying to yourself.

Rachel Wilson revisiting 1st post: My views have not changed from what i said above. I think Holden fits the personality of an adolescent. He only shares some things with the people that he really cares about. He sort of shares his feelings with Phoebe but in an unspoken way that she understands. I think it is extremley hard for Holden to open up to people and that is what causes people to be pushed away from him. I also think that in Holden's mind, and to the reader, Holden shares alot of his emotions. He says exactly how he feels about other people and he makes observations about himself. I think that the turning point for Holden is when he is watching Phoebe on the carrousel. He decided not to ride it and i think that shows that he is at the upward reach to process Allies death and to get out of his depression. He starts crying while he is watching Phoebe and i think he realizes that she is genuinley happy and that is what he wants to be. He had been going through a really hard time in his life and after gooing through this turning point in his life, he has reached a new maturity level and become a "better" person.

Emily Honey - I believe that the average adolescent reveals a lot about themselves in this day and age. However, that is an assumption, not fact. There are opposite sides of the spectrum on this issue. I think someone can reveal every tidbit of information about themselves and there is more access to this on social networking sites. Whereas someone could also stay completely to themselves and live a secluded life. The average adolescent girl probably reveals about 50% of the things shes thinking and feeling with those around her. While, on the other hand, the average adolescent boy probably reveals around 10% of their true feelings and thoughts. This drastic difference in the amount of thoughts and feelings revealed has to do with how emotional in a whole the gender is according to societal norms. I am not saying, however, that we are all carbon copies of each other and reveal the same amount about ourselves, but there is so many opportunities now to constantly update your 'status' and let the world know. Its no longer an issue of sharing with those around you but with everyone, anywhere. Also, now, and especially in Carrboro and Chapel Hill, there is less room for judgment and more of peoples thoughts and feelings will be accepted. There is less of a fear to reveal true feelings, therefore more people share, from what I can tell anyway.

====Claire in response to Emily Honey- I agree with Emily that it really depends on the person. Some people are very shy while others are very open. It has to do with how we are raised and the things we experience throughout our lives. Girls, at our age are probably a little more open, but I don't think you can really generalize it. I really liked Emily's comment on the social networking sites. This makes a lot more people open to the rest of the world and may make some people more outgoing than they are in person. Sites like Omegle, where you can chat with a random stranger, make it oddly easy to open up to people. I do agree that today, people are more open with one another and our world, as a whole, is more accepting than in the past.====

Darien in Response to Emmie Doherty - Emmie's response holds some truth in my personal opinion. I do believe that there is a barrier between a teenager and his/her parents when it comes to the communication of emotions, feelings or thoughts. I feel this is mostly due to the fact a teenager must rely and appease the image of what their parents want them to be molded in to. If there is any emotion or thought that conflicts with that vision it usually ends up worse for the Adolescent thus giving them no reason to truly express what they feel in a genuine way. I do not agree however with the statement that everyone has that best friend which they can discuss all their problems and emotions to. Many people do not have the social situation to have a best friend to confide in all the intimate details and internal struggles they have. Having this sort of relationship is a luxury in the brutally competitive social atmosphere that adolescence is known for.  Emily Morris responding to Emmie Doherty- I disagree with Emmie on this one. I know that some of my friends tell their parents or at least on of them everything. Although, I don’t tell my parents everything I think I do share my emotions with them. They don’t have to know what has happened or why I’m feeling good or bad but they can still tell. Emotions feed off of each other so in a way everyone shares their emotions with the people around them. In the sense of sharing verbally I think it very much depends on the particular adolescent in question. Some might speak about what they feel as a remedy and others might keep it inside because they don't have anyone they feel comfortable speaking to about some things. It depends on the person.