First+Period-+Question+2

Group Members: Megan May, Nancy Perez, Taylor Rogalski, Josh Falek **Question #2** ===**To what extent does the average adult reveal his or her true emotions and thoughts to the people around him or her?**===

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Nancy Perez - The average adult reveals his or her true emotions and thoughts to the people around them him or her by their actions and to what they are saying. An average adult compared to an average teenager in majority adults have a better way to express what they feel and think. An avereage adult is a bit more careful to what they are doing and what they are saying because they know what is the aftermath of their choises. They have lived a little bit more and know a bit more because of their past experiences. But then not all adults grow up. Some just know when to quit a "dirty" habbit. A dirty habbit to me could be like selling drugs or taking drugs. Another could be by how not careful they manage their money when they have a family to support. So not all average adults reveal their feelings or thoughts carefuly like they should. To know what an average adult feels or thinks is to what extent of information we know him or her. Their morals and the type of problem they carry. Not many average adults is not very easy to open because what they have lived through. That adult must find someone they must absolutly trust. Its hard to find someone but its possible. When him or her talk to this person him or her feels better but they both keep it very confidential. I belive they do this for others that love him or her don't get to find out. If the person who loves him or her and gets to find out, well it will hurt. Its normal to let it hurt because its the truth and the truth will always hurt.======

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//Taylor Rogalski// - The average adult reveals his or her true emotions and thoughts to varying extents depending on their audience. To a child, primarily one of their own, they must censor themselves completely to "shelter" them. Children are impressionable, so many adults are very careful about what they say around them. Many things could be misinterpreted and negatively effect the rest of the child's outlook on life, so there is a sense that everything needs to be sugar-coated for a good portion of the child's life. Thus, inherent dishonesty becomes prevalent. As for being around their peers, I think that a lot of adults feel the need to seem calloused and "grown up," something that is sacrificed when they open up to their friends. Opening up is a sure sign of weakness, something that very few people want to reveal to those around them. I think that in the case of many men, talking about things with deeper meaning around their guy-friends is frowned upon in adulthood, whereas with women it may not be so. Seeming professional is directly tied to being emotionally calloused in many cases.====== __Emma O'Halloran__ (responding to Taylor)- I agree with what you are saying. The extent to which people will open up and express themselves really does depend on their audience. If they feel comfortable with who they are around, they are more likely to express themselves. On the other hand, if they are surrounded by people they don't trust or don't feel comfortable with, they are less likely to express themselves around them. I like how you explain how adults act around children. Adults do feel like they need to act more grown up around children so they don't show any weaknesses. They want to be seen as strong around them and opening up to them would seem weak. The difference between guys and girls is also interesting. I agree that for men it is seen as a sign of weakness to open up to each other, and yet for women it is seen as normal.

Josh Falek - I believe that the average adult does not always show their emotions because they’re trying to remain professional and serious. These adults, I think, feel that they will only be taken seriously if they leave their emotions at home. This is not much different than what we are taught to do in school, because it’s hard to complete a test when you’re crying. Adults try to seem serious so that they are taken as such, with these emotions, they could only be taken as silly by most other adults. They however do reveal their emotions to people around them who are friends or family. Adults want to protect themselves and their reputations, but, they do reveal themselves and their emotions little by little. Through small jokes, gestures, motions, actions, and many other small deeds that can show the other people around them their true emotions. I think the average adult expresses themselves through sarcasm, which they feel can be defensive, offensive, and funny at the same time. I think the average adult is also careful to prevent what they say and how they act to define their whole lives so they are not forever stalked by the little mistake they made ten years ago. Thus, their emotions many not be truly expressed, so to prevent this. I think that adults are protective of themselves, and that this is probably a smart thing to do, and thus don’t express themselves nearly as much as the melodramatic teens of my age. However, I think that one can always truly see an adult’s emotions if they know them well enough.

Caitlyn Threadgill responding to Josh Falek: I definitely agree with you when you mentioned typically most adults do not show their emotions. Many adults are so busy with jobs, family, hobbies, etc. they might not even have the chance to express the way they feel. While at work adults want to remain professional as you mentioned and there is no time to act silly or break down in tears. Whereas teenagers tend to completely lash out everything on their mind and some even express themselves so much because they crave attention. Adults are much more careful about the way they act and what they say around people because they have learned from previous experiences that complaining about having a bad morning will get them nowhere in their job. Adults tend to give up their time to express themselves because they have even more responsibilities than us teenagers. But I do also agree with you when you said that adults do typically show their emotions and feelings to close friends and family members. Since adults know their friends and family will not judge them they feel more comfortable revealing how they truly feel about different aspects of their life. Adults might not always seem to show little too any emotions but they do tell someone usually because sometimes everyone needs to talk about how their day was, what's on their mind, etc.

Emily H responding to Josh: I certainly agree with the first statement Josh lead with. I think that adults believe they have to always be serious and to remain serious you can't show any emotion. I like the professional vibe Josh brought to this. It's an interesting take that I wouldn't have thought of. The idea that adults would leave their thoughts and emotions at home so that they are taken seriously outside of the house. It's almost something that you're taught, he's right about that one. Public emotions = bad. He makes a valid point by stating that adults watch how they act around certain groups and what they say. Most adults have a filter which is something youth often lack.

Megan May- I don't think the average adult usually shares their true emotions to the people around them. The exception to this statement in my mind is that an adult would normally share their feelings with a very close friend or a spouse. I think Adults normally have a few close friends around them which they are willing to tell important things to. However, you rarely see a responsible adult yelling at another adult. Adults normally know what is appropriate to say. They understand that words have consequences. In order to be successful in life and have people respect you, you need to keep bad thoughts inside your head. An adult cannot walk around and express their true emotions because a lot of the time those emotions are not good. If an adult does not like a person, they would most likely not express this to the person because they know it would not be appropriate and could get them in trouble. Adults need to be professional for work and other situations. They need to keep a good reputation because they are dealing with many people and what they do can come back to haunt them. It is not as easy for an adult to get a clean start than it is for a teenager. I believe teenagers express themselves more frequently by arguing, swearing, fighting, and not caring what others think about them. Adults are different because most of the time they keep their emotions to themselves or a small group of people while most teens are not afraid to share their emotions with many different people around them.  Emmie Doherty responding to Megan May- I definitely agree with you that the average adult does not share their true emotions with the people around them. And as you said this is a good thing that some teenagers need to learn to do. In order to be part of society it is necessary to learn to hold your tongue. By adulthood most people have control over their emotions and can filter what they say. On the other hand, teenagers are going through many changes and can have very strong emotions that they may not be able to control, resulting in little to no filter over what they say. The only people adults really share with, like you said, is a spouse or close friend. Adults have faith that a friend or spouse won’t tell others what they have said, so they feel safe sharing what they really think. Like you said, adults need to control what they say because it could have adverse affects, which is why they don’t typically share their emotions.

Joyce Carter responding to Megan May - I agree with your statment that the average adult usually doesn't share their true emotions to the people around them. Most adults are too busy trying to keep their jobs and taking care of families that they don't waist time expressing their own true feelings. They may have friends who work with them or live in their neighborhood, but rarely do their conversations deal with who ticked them off that day or who brightened their day. They tend to talk about the printer at their job jamming for the hundreth time or how many clothes they have to wash when they get home. Keeping their emotions inside, trying not to talk about the things that they actually care about. I believe that some adults even hide their deepest feelings from their families, mainly the children, so that they always appear strong to their children. I have heard my grandmother cry and call out her husband's name for years now, and she doesn't know that she's doing it. Although, I will always consider her one of the strongest women I know, and I tell her so constantly, I know that she will never confess to how much her widowed heart still bleeds for her husband.

Josh Falek as Holden - Adults are all pretty much phonies as far as I am concerned. If they reveal feelings, they probably are not even theirs or if they are, they are just so impure. All these people never notice anything because they never do, or say, or express anything. Adults only reveal things when it's for their benefit. You know? I mean they walk around all day with their heads held up high and their step so quick, they don't even try to hide their phoniness, so why would they try to reveal their fake emotions. Of course these phonies hide everything, only pretending the world is perfect. Allie would agree with me, he would, he always could tell if someone were lying or not, and goddammit, those sonuvabitches were always lying. Those people never emote, they only try to take and take and take. The world is a cruel place, and so they hide themselves to escape it, just becoming more fake. It makes me so damn mad, all I see are these adults who act so phony, never revealing themselves because it's "unprofessional"! Well who goddamn cares if it's unprofessional, why the hell would you live your life like that! Adults never reveal their emotions, if they did, it would change who they were. They wouldn't be adults anymore.

Nancy Perez "Holton speaking": Not very much adults reveal their emotions. They all are phonies and don't so any concern to what their child is feeling. They only say what they wnat for their child to do, but to say what to do is much easier than actually doing the work. I wonder if they ever think if its easy for us. Their are time diffrences creating a diffrent amount of pressure to some certain things. Like my dad wants me to go to this university and I don't. Its easy for him to say go when actually being their is diffrent.

Megan May as Holden - Adults hardly ever show their true emotions to the people around them. They're such phonies, I mean they will just say whatever the hell they think they //should// say. All of my teachers have told me just about the same thing. They tell me to get my act together, but they never are convincing. What they tell me just never seems to be genuine. I mean, when Phoebe talked to me about quitting school, I could tell she meant what she said. Kids always express themselves more. Phoebe isn't afraid to criticize me or tell me the truth. Adults are just not as expressive in their emotions. Adults are always just trying to be professional and make money. Take a laywer for example, if you're a laywer, all you do is make a lot of dough and play golf and play bridge and buy cars and drink Martinis and look like a hot-shot. You don't express your feelings and just live to look good and make money. That's why I would love to be the catcher in the rye. I could save kids from falling off the edge and they could live happily and keep their innocence and express their emotions. Once a child turns into an adult, it is hard to be able to express what he or she feels.

Taylor Rogalski as Holden: It's really rare these days for grown-ups to be honest with eachother. Hell, they can't even be honest with us kids, or in secret. They're all just damn phonies. All they care about it making money and seeming sophisticated. Not once have my parents opened up to me, for chrissake. Not that I'm not better off because of it; I am. It showed me how everyone in the world is a liar and you should only trust yourself. Life's easier that way, if you just see through everyones phonyness and take them for what they are.